Bloguary #21 - "No, I'm fine, thanks"

How are you? You're fine? Yeah right, and now for real! Your head hurts, you cried yourself to sleep yesterday and you feel like you're fat and you have no friends, right? What is it that always makes us lie about what we really feel? We want to be lovely, we want to be happy and we want to make others think that we are the most bubbly and the most fun person to be around. We can only tell the people we really care about how we feel, but there's an exception ; when you're afraid of losing someone, you don't want to express your feelings ; being afraid that they will get sick of you and your endless tears. So what to do next? What to do with unspoken and unknown feelings? Let's make a list of things we can do to clear our mind without really telling those ones (YET!)

1.Write it down Take a piece of paper and write a very personal letter to the one you want to tell everything to. You can even do this in your diary if you want. Don't get them the actual letter, we will get to the 'telling' part later.

2.Come up with a powersentence You can come up with a powersentence. Maybe it's an angry one, like "You aren't worth my tears you 'beep beep beep'". It can also be a encouraging one, like "I'm worth more than this pain and I can do this, I can deal with this!". Take a pillow, burry your head in it and scream it out. If you're a dare devil you can also just scream it out loud, but when you have an angry sentence, that's not what I recommend..

3.Get that music going To me, crying is one of the best resolutions to sadness. Sometimes, I just feel so sad that all I can do is cry. I don't see any positive things and I just cuddle up next to my mum and cry it out. It helps, to me at least. But, afterwards, you'll feel like your empty. Anyways, when you want to cry but you just can't, you can listen to a song that means a lot to you, or just any sad -maybe love- song. Another musical resolution is to blast your favorite happy song through your speakers. It might give you some energy, but in the end, it won't really solve the problem.

4.Tell your pet or your stuffed animal This is what I do sometimes, not very often though. He or she won't judge, will always choose your side and will listen to you for -literally- ever if you wanted them to.

After these steps, there's a big of a chance that your anger or sadness has gone down a bit. This is the moment where you start to think a bit more clearly. Now take the letter your wrote and screen it. Make a reasonable and clear story, but don't filter your real feelings. Put them down and make sure that the one who'll hear it from you -you thought it was that easy? Just giving the letter? No no you're going to read it out loud- will understand what you're talking about. Ask them if they will give you the time to listen and not directly interrupt you when they hear something they don't agree with. You can talk afterwards and hopefully he or she will understand. If this is not the case, and they get mad or something like that, you have to realise that you have done everything you could. If they aren't able to deal with and help with you with your problems, you should try to let that go.

Take time for yourselve to make things right. Maybe when you feel fine again, your friendship will be like as it always was before. You have friends to laugh with and friends to cry with and they're all worth the same. They all are very important. I hope I might have helped some people out today. If there's something bothering you, talk and maybe cry about it. And remember ; YOLO. A bad day doesn't mean you have a bad life. After rain the sun will shine again. Enough with the cheesyness, bye guys!
Love, Stella.

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